Alright, let’s cut the bullshit. You suck at trading. I suck at trading. Most of us suck at trading. And it’s not because the market is rigged—though it might as well be—it’s because we’re making some dumbass mistakes that run way deeper than just clicking “buy” on some meme stock. So buckle up and let’s dive into why you’re swimming in your tears and sweat watching those red numbers while the suits are swimming in champagne.
Obvious Reasons You Suck:
FOMO Got You by the Balls:
You see a rocket emoji on Wall Street Bets, and suddenly, you’re all in on some crap like AMC at $60, thinking you’ll be rich by Friday. But when that “to the moon” promise crashes back to Earth, you’re left holding a bag heavier than your student loans. Don’t lie—you’ve done it. Hell, we all have. Welcome aboard, sailor.
Overconfidence Is Your Kryptonite:
You made one good call on Tesla back in the day, and now you think you’re fucking Warren Buffett. So you YOLO your life savings on some obscure biotech stock because “you did your DD.” Fast forward to August 2024, and you’re wondering why your portfolio looks like a dumpster fire. Remember that “DD” you did? Yeah, it was dogshit.
Self-education is for the weak, isn’t it?
Chasing Losses Like a Desperate Ex:
You lose a couple of grand, and instead of walking away, you double down on a different meme stock, thinking you’re about to make a comeback. Spoiler: you don’t. Remember when Bed Bath & Beyond went bust? You were there, chasing it down like a psycho ex, and now your portfolio’s as empty as that store’s shelves. You’re lucky not to have a restraining orders from the market.
Now for the Real Reasons You’re Still Broke:
You’re Trading for the Fucking Thrill:
You’re not here to make money; you’re here because trading gives you a bigger rush than your drug dealer can. It’s not about profits—it’s about that high when a stock jumps 10% and you feel like God. Then it crashes, and you’re back to feeling like a loser who can’t pay rent.
Or just no change for a whole minute
Tell me to stop when it starts to sound not like about you: You jumped on Intel after the AI hype, not because you knew jack shit about semiconductors, but because the thrill of catching the wave was too sweet to resist. You bought high, sold low, and now you’re wondering why the fuck you didn’t just stick to index funds. Or Nvidia.
You’re Emotionally Invested in Crap:
You bought Palantir at $30 because you “believed” in their tech, not because you actually understood their financials. You’re holding onto it like it’s your firstborn, even as it tanks, because you can’t admit that maybe, just maybe, you fucked up.
Imagine: You held onto Blackberry because, let’s be real, you’ve got a hard-on for nostalgia. It’s 2024, and you’re still clinging to the hope that a phone from 2008 is gonna make a comeback. Guess what? It’s not. Let it go.
You Don’t Know Shit About What You’re Doing:
Let’s face it—you’re in way over your head. You read one or two Reddit threads and think you’re the next big thing. But in reality, you couldn’t analyze a balance sheet if your life depended on it. So you’re out here buying shit like Robinhood, thinking it’s a sure bet, while the pros are laughing all the way to the bank.
If you don’t know what a green candle is… Well, maybe you ARE special
How to Stop Sucking:
Trade Like A Grown-Ass Adult: If you’re buying a stock, have a goddamn reason that’s not just “because Reddit said so.” Learn how to pick stocks, do some real research, and if you’re just here for the thrill, go to a casino instead—at least there, you get free drinks while you lose your money.
Cut the Cord on Your Shitty Stocks: If a stock is tanking, and you’re holding on because you “believe in it,” slap yourself in the face and sell that shit. Don’t get emotionally attached to your investments—this isn’t a rom-com, it’s the fucking stock market.
Educate Your Sorry Ass: Stop thinking you’re a genius because you made a few bucks on Dogecoin. Learn how to read a financial statement, understand market trends, and actually manage risk. If you don’t know what you’re doing, the market will eat you alive and shit you out. And—surprise, surprise—learning now is the most fucking accessible thing in trading!
It’s your lucky day if you’ve read until this point: my pals from Pepperstone give out a 3-month access to the TradingView terminal and their educational library. Not just the bullshit you can google, but the real deal. Check it out here.
Final Word:
The market doesn’t care about your feelings or your little dreams of buying a Lambo. It’s a brutal, unforgiving beast that rewards the smart and crushes the stupid. So stop fucking around, get serious, and maybe—just maybe—you’ll stop sucking at trading.
submitted by /u/caps-unlock
[link] [comments]